Thursday, September 12, 2013

Why do we avoid what is good for us?

I came across this today...

For many months now it has been the truth. But I can't lie...the last few weeks have been hard. Not hard in the sense that I find it difficult to run or don't have the time, but hard in the sense that my heart just hasn't been in it. I haven't been turning to running. I have no idea why. I haven't been sticking to any running schedule at all and last week was the first week in about 6 months that I ran less than 20 miles. I actually only ran 10. I don't necessarily feel burned out, I just feel bleh.

Honestly in turn, so does the rest of my life. Running gives me so much clarity and patience. It does so much for me and yet I have been turning it down. Why do we do that? Why do we avoid the things that are so good for us?

I think sometimes when I am overwhelmed I just mentally think it is easier to give up on myself. I am sure many people can relate to that. We all go through times like that.

Likewise I am afraid or nervous of failing so I don't try at all.

Ugh these two things are behaviors/habits I hate about myself and sticking with running these past months have really helped me turn away from those thoughts and start to out grow them. Somehow though these last few weeks I felt the old me creeping back, just a little. Doubting myself, running away from running no pun intended and making excuses...

I have 16 days till my third half marathon. I have 16 days to put my heart back into what I love and get my head together. I am making a commitment to myself to not feel sorry about the last few weeks. I think we dwell too hard sometimes on our mistakes or set backs.

Sometimes they are just what they are; mistakes & setbacks. 

So here goes it...16 days until I stand on yet another starting line.

Which brings me to my last thought for today...I think one of the best parts of being a runner is the gift of every starting line. If you run you get this new beginning, new chance with every race.

This sport is just full of great symbolism for life. Often we reflect on making it to the finishing line. The accomplishments. But I for one think that the starting line is not one to be over looked :)