Wednesday, October 12, 2016

The update of all updates

Three years and seven days ago, Jacob and I were 25 years old. We put our very first house on the market and Jake sat down for a few hours and took one of the most important tests of his life, the LSAT.


Now just a few weeks ago he started his very last year of law school and tears just fell from my cheeks on the Monday morning he left to catch the train for the very last FIRST time.

Time is just going too fast. We never imagined it would and yet of course it did.

We moved back home to Illinois from Wisconsin for him to attend the school he REALLY wanted and I changed my whole career path from over eager college grad in a corporate environment to a nanny.

I started this blog mostly because I was inspired by so many others who shared every detail of their life (the good, the bad and the ugly)…AND my passion for running…
 
 
but I think the biggest reason was to capture and remember every ounce of this huge leap of faith we took and our new adventure.

I failed.

I don’t really think it is because I lost inspiration but I just think I kind of lost myself. Not really in a bad way, just in a way I can’t really put into words. Transition is hard and wonderful all at the same time and I guess I wasn’t as great at putting it into words as I thought I would be.

To be honest this last year has been rough.

I think the beginning of this journey looked and actually felt glamorous. While my friends were starting to feel the weight of being adults, Jacob and I figured out a way to go back to being kids. We traveled and felt free of adult responsibility…pretty much that whole first year of law school.
 
 
Loan money is a dangerous fortune to have and so is the cushion of my in laws' house. We moved in with them the first semester and for the very first time in a LONG time my only real bill was our cell phones. I don’t even feel ashamed. That was pretty freaking fantastic!

The second year of law school we moved out of the ‘rents and had an adorable studio apartment closer to the city (Chicago for those of you who don’t pay attention) and then later that year we knew we needed more room and decided to rent a house farther from the city. A house really helped us feel like grown ups again and I think we probably will stay here until the landlord pulls me out kicking and screaming. Jacob was hired as a clerk at a great law firm close by and is still there today whenever he isn’t at school. Pretty much he is happy as a clam doing exactly what he wants to be doing.
 

As for me I am a nanny for a new family and although I may one day explain how that came about, today I am just not ready. However I will say I never ever thought that after my last experience I would sign up for the position again, but I can’t even explain how much joy my job brings me now. I really felt a pull to go back and use my college degree after things ended with the previous family, but just when you think you know where you belong God shows you. I had one interview with this family and I knew it was where I belonged.

SO I guess thats where I will end today… If you didn’t already figure it out I am back. Like really back. No maybes this time. I miss this space. I miss connecting with new friends all over this crazy planet and I always knew when the time was right I would be ready to really dedicate myself to this blog and I know that time is now.

I hope for some of you I am an ancient person still left on your blog lovin’ feed and this pops up!! if so!! shoot me a comment! I would love to know you are here reading. I may have disappeared, but if you have a blog I can almost guarantee that I am still reading yours. I promise to get better at comments too... now that I am back in the swing of things :)  

tons of love.
jess

4 comments:

  1. Welcome back!!! Glad to hear you are settled back in to Chicago life. I think we all go through a period where we sort of lose ourselves and I hope that you are getting back to feeling like you.

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    1. Thank you!!! Congratulations on your baby girl!!! :)

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  2. I've wondered how you were doing!!! Funny how you think you really know someone when you read their blogs. Maybe soon I'll get back to updating my own blog. I know the feeling of "losing yourself". #thestruggleisreal. Glad you are back!

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    1. aw thanks girl!!! the struggle is real!!

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